How to Write Your Own Wedding Vows
Writing your own vows is such a sweet way to personalize your ceremony and make it even more memorable. But, it can be a daunting and intimidating task to start! When should you begin writing your vows? How long should they be? What should you even write!? We have a few tips and an amazing resource to help!
Sharing private vows during the first look / Heather Lynn Photo
To help you get started customizing your wedding vows, here are a few examples of things you might want to include:
You can share your favorite memories and moments from your relationship, or describe the moment you fell in love.
Share what you love most about your partner, and what you’re looking forward to in your future.
Include a quote from your favorite poem or lyrics from a song that is special to the two of you.
And the below should be obvious, but for the record, there are a few things you should NOT do when writing your own vows:
Don’t copy/paste something from the internet. 1) It probably won’t sound like you, and 2) that would be so rude to your partner! Your vows should be heartful and genuine. It’s okay to draw inspiration from others’ vows, but personalize them to your relationship and put them in your own voice.
Do not bring up or compare your partner to past relationships. Even though you might want to include some anecdote about how much better your soon-to-be spouse is, obviously if you’re getting married, they already know this! So why bring up exes on your wedding day?
Lastly, don’t write for an “audience.” Writing your vows as a speech to impress your guests takes away from the sincerity and meaningfulness of personalizing your vows. You are making vows TO YOUR PARTNER, so focus your words on and to them.
Writing your own vows is vulnerable and you might not feel comfortable sharing your vows in front of guests.
Your vows and the commitments you make to one another are intimate, and you can totally keep them just between the two of you! Many couples choose to repeat traditional vows during their ceremony in front of guests and privately share their handwritten vows during the first look. If you’re not having a first look, you can put them in a letter for your partner to read on the morning of your wedding.
Sarah and Jorgen share their wedding vows during the first look // Heather Lynn Photo
Now that you’re ready to begin writing your vows, you need the Vow Journal from I Just Want to Say!
This professionally designed journal takes you through the process of writing your own vows in a simple and easy way, with fun and thoughtful prompts to reflect on and respond to and vow examples for inspiration.
Not only is the journal a useful tool, but it is such a sweet keepsake! The journals also include “Memory Pages” that leave a space for you to add photos and write down any notes or special memories.
As described by I Just Want to Say:
“The Vow Journal is your fool-proof guide to writing wedding vows within 30 days. Pick up this journal, brainstorm away, and fill in the last few pages with a draft of your vows.
Not sure what to say? We've included famous love letters to inspire your words.
Between the prompts and love letters are memory pages where you can add images, text, and anything else that will help you make this journal a lasting gift to your loved one. “
PS: Use code “Happilily” for 10% off your purchase!
We’ll leave you with one last tip; if you’re going to write your own vows, you should literally write them.
First of all, reading from your phone just isn’t the same level of romance as reading from a handwritten letter or vow book. For such a special moment, take the time to write down your vows.
Second, you’ll want to write them down so you can forever remember your thoughtful words and commitments to one another! Think back to your engagement — do you remember everything your partner said? You were probably so caught up in the moment that it’s hard to recall exactly what was said! Whether in a letter, a vow book, or printed on an acrylic/wood sign (or if you’re so inclined, you could record your vows as a song!), your partner will love having a copy of your vows to look back on.
Handwritten letter to the bride // Heather Lynn Photo
