How To Be The Best Personal Attendant
If you’ve found this blog post, you’ve probably been asked to be a personal attendant at your friend’s wedding. What is a personal attendant? What are your responsibilities during the day? Use these tips to be the best personal attendant for your bride!
Tiffany Kokal Photography
What is a personal attendant?
A personal attendant is someone the bride appoints to help her throughout the wedding day from getting ready through the grand exit. As a personal attendant, your role is to keep the bride calm and alleviate as much stress as you can.
What sort of things does a personal attendant do?
Your biggest tasks are going to be keeping track of the bride’s personal belongings, helping fix any makeup/wardrobe malfunctions, and bustling the dress. To be a good personal attendant, you should be ready and willing to do so much more!
Common tasks of a personal attendant:
Bring breakfast/snacks to the venue for the wedding party in the morning.
Monitor the bride’s phone for texts from the wedding party or family.
Steam dresses for the bridesmaids or suits for the groomsmen.
Make sure the bride is drinking water and eats a little something before the ceremony!
Go with the bride to her First Look, and have tissues and makeup touchup items ready.
Corral bridesmaids, groomsmen, and family members for photos.
Go with the wedding party during photos so you can hold personal belongings and carry the bride’s bouquet when needed.
If the bride doesn’t have a wedding coordinator, you will be the one waiting with her right before she walks down the aisle; fluff her train, ensure her veil is perfectly laid out, fix any flyaway hairs, and give her words of encouragement before the big reveal!
Hold the bride’s purse and phone throughout the night.
Run errands if needed, such as picking up forgotten items from the bride’s house or running to the store for socks for the groomsman who forgot his.
Help the bride with restroom breaks.
Ensure the bride and groom have drinks in hand/at their table.
Always be at-the-ready to run back to the bridal suite in case the bride has forgotten anything.
At the end of the night, collect the couple’s personal belongings and make sure they take their overnight bag in the getaway car.
Help the wedding party tidy up/organize the bridal suite before the venue closes.
And be ready to help with unexpected mishaps by packing a wedding emergency kit for the wedding party!
To be the best personal attendant, you need to show up on wedding day with a positive mindset, a calm demeanor, and a well-stocked emergency kit ready to handle any surprises throughout the day!
What sort of items should you pack in a wedding emergency kit? Start with the basics like bobby pins, pain relievers, band-aids, Tums, floss, hairspray, spray deodorant, stain removers, nail files/clippers, a lint roller, scissors, and a mini sewing kit. Don’t forget to also pack a phone charger and it’s a great idea to bring a portable speaker just in case the venue’s getting ready space doesn’t have one!
Other commonly needed items you may not think of (but will be so appreciated) are Q-tips, nail glue, oil-blotting sheets, extra beauty blenders, contact solution and redness relief drops. For outdoor weddings, be sure to pack bug spray, sunscreen, and a portable handheld fan for your bride!
As a personal attendant, are you also the wedding coordinator?
No. A personal attendant is focused on the personal needs of the bride — things like fixing wardrobe malfunctions, steaming dresses, running last-minute errands, helping the couple exchange gifts in the morning, calling Aunt Jane when she’s late to the venue with lunch, carrying around the bride’s purse for makeup touch-ups, etc. A wedding coordinator has a completely different role, focused on assisting vendors, directing setup, and managing the logistics of the event. As a personal attendant, your role is to be by the bride’s side.
Some brides confuse the role of a personal attendant as more of a… shall we say, manual labor role and they expect their friend to act as their setup crew, teardown crew, and wedding coordinator, all-in-one. Unfortunately, I can tell you about at least three friends who’ve ended up in a not-so-great situation after being asked to be a “personal attendant” when what the bride really wanted was free labor. Ultimately, as a personal attendant, you are still a guest and not a vendor, so we hope your bride isn’t expecting you to step into a wedding coordinator’s shoes! Before you say, “yes” to being a personal attendant, ask the bride what she expects you to manage so you aren’t surprised on the day of her wedding.
If you’ve been asked to be a personal attendant, know that it means so much to your bride-to-be! It is such an honor to support your friend on one of her most memorable days, and she chose you for a reason.
We hope this blog post is helpful so you know just what to do to ensure your friend has the BEST wedding day.
Brides — send this link to your personal attendant to help them out!
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